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Fifty Shades of Cloud

August 22, 2012

OK, thanks to “Terri” for this line… While this post may not be as um, stimulating as the best selling “Grey,” I can only hope it’s not ripped apart the way some have panned the novel. On, I read a hilarious review by “DS from LA.” One complaint is, “…the repetition…and the repetition…and the repetition.”

“I have discovered that Ana says “Jeez” 81 times and “oh my” 72 times. She “blushes” or “flushes” 125 times, including 13 that are “scarlet,” 6 that are “crimson,” and one that is “stars and stripes red.” (I can’t even imagine.) Ana “peeks up” at Christian 13 times, and there are 9 references to Christian’s “hooded eyes,” 7 to his “long index finger,” and 25 to how “hot” he is (including four recurrences of the epic declarative sentence “He’s so freaking hot.”). Christian’s “mouth presses into a hard line” 10 times. Characters “murmur” 199 times, “mutter” 49 times, and “whisper” 195 times (doesn’t anyone just talk?), “clamber” on/in/out of things 21 times, and “smirk” 34 times. Christian and Ana also “gasp” 46 times and experience 18 “breath hitches,” suggesting a need for prompt intervention by paramedics. Finally, in a remarkable bit of symmetry, our hero and heroine exchange 124 “grins” and 124 “frowns”… which, by the way, seems an awful lot of frowning for a woman who experiences “intense,” “body-shattering,” “delicious,” “violent,” “all-consuming,” “turbulent,” “agonizing” and “exhausting” orgasms on just about every page.”

That paragraph of numerology made me think of this blog. No, not the “body-shattering” part (I wish), but the repetition…and the repetition…and the repetition. This morning I did a little text analytics  and found the following “most annoyingly overused phrases.” I’ve used “cloud” 271 times, including 14 that were “delicious,” but none that were “agonizing.” “SaaS” has been used 65 times, preceded by “freaking hot” on 27 of those occasions. “Cloud services” comes in at a nice round 100, including “intense” and “delicious,” but never “turbulent,” “agonizing” or “exhausting.”

Finally… and I’m biting my lip over this one. The term “HR” appears 486 times. Must be my inner goddess or a Freudian thing…

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